Imbalanced me

It's been the Holidays that I waited for so long..
While taking some break time, I discover something within myself..

I notice that I started to become imbalance.
Imbalance in term of everything..
I am not as healthy as before, easily fall sick and get tired..
I am not as rational as before, emotion comes and goes easily..
I am not as steady as before, I doubt myself more and more frequent recently..

When I look at my coursemates, some of them are getting closer and closer..
Meanwhile I felt that I been so far away from them.
I neither wanna talk nor think about why it happen..
This make me reflect back on the Friendship issue I brought last time..

Friend,
What make a friend?
How people can be good friends?
Why people willing to spend time, effort, and energy on people that they call friend but not to the others?
Where can find those that are "gam" to be friends?
Who are those that can be consider friends and what differentiate them from others?
When can these friendship last for long?

For me,
Relationship, either friendship or romantic kind of relationship,
is fragile, very fragile..
X can be friend with B when problem 1 occur
X can be friend with C or D when problem 2,3 occur but no longer friend B..
Simple problems might kill the relationship..
A simple misunderstanding will cause a big trouble in the relationship..

Since it is so fragile, should we give more time on it?
But the matter is HOW?
Every single individual in this world have their own thinking and way of doing things.
Your way might match with individual A,B,C,D but not with X,Y,Z
Aren't it been very tiring if to match all by altering our own style?

As stated in my own profile there,
I describe myself as a rational and radical person..
Yes, indeed, I am still a rational and radical person..
I been tired of adjusting
I been tired of waiting
I been tired of hoping other to understand me
I been tired of seeing all those easy changed world
YET
This is the reality world
This is what happen in real life
This is what we call as LIFE

This post gonna be a real long one..
Am trying very hard to release all my imbalance emotions..
If I got the time, I want to get close to everyone that I wish to..
If I got the patient, I want to listen to all friends problem..
If I got the passion, I want to change all the bad and negative thinking among friends..
The matter is, I don't have all that..

Who don't wish to have a lot of friends and people care for them?
Who don't wish to get people listen to them?
I didn't mention my problems always doesn't mean I don't have problem..
It doesn't means that I don't need time from other to listen to me..
It doesn't means that I been so selfish that I care so little about others..

Yet, I am glad I have a bunch of best pals with me..
Thanks again to you guys!
When I think of you all, I felt much better and balanced back!


This holiday would be a right timing for me to balance up all things and get back to the usual me again!

p/s: This post is just a sharing of emotion and thought, not referring to any single object nor people ^^

放假！

之前决定给自己好好地休息休息，就在这个假期中~

可是回到家中，

不管有多少东西要做，踢我也不会动了

回到家中的我，

就像王一样

什么都不用烦

什么都不用做

天天吃饱睡，睡饱吃

就快像只猪了啦！

回到家中，

就已经习惯被家人宠的感觉！

有人帮我准备一切一切

不用我去想

不用我去烦

真是快活~~~

可是，也有点不好

我变得习惯了

我习惯有人宠我

我习惯有人帮我搞掂一切

我变得不爱听教

变得不耐烦

变得贪心

我真的太不应该了吧！

我把一切一切都看得太理所当然了

是时候改变一下心态了啦！

不管怎样~

大家大家，假期快乐！！！

完成！

终于完成了！！

明天去解放解放

礼拜二再来做最后的冲刺！

我好像看到可爱的假期正在跟我打招呼了~ =)

Friends...

I am glad that I have such nice friends with me now~
I might be busy that I couldn't always ask and care about others..
But my friends are understanding!

They are those people that make me feel warm always!
They are those people that make me feel that I worth for their care..
They are those people that care about me when I am stress up, when I am sad, when I am tired!

I am glad that I have you all! =)
am glad that the problems between us gone!
am glad that I found another best friend!
am glad that when I am depress, there are someone that knocked me and chat with me!
am glad when I feel down and want to express my feeling, there are someone that willing to listen to me!

Thanks to Grace,
Thanks to MeiWen,
Thanks to ChingMan,
Thanks to Patrick,
Thanks to Jarod,
Thanks to Timmy,
Thanks to ShuShean
and all those that care about me=)

最后的赶工+感想！

现在步入最后的阶段

还有一点点就完成了！

感觉上好累哦~

这真不是人过的生活啊！

排山倒海的功课、责任等等

真的让我充分的学习时间管理~

*

以前的我，

凡事都想要要求完美，

功课我总是老早就解决！

每天闲闲没事做，上网看戏等等的

*

现在的我，

想要要求完美也没有那个本事了

一天24小时对我来说并不足够！

对于需要充分睡眠的我来说，

这两个月的睡眠量肯定是我人生以来最少的了！

时间管理，

看似容易，做时难！！！

*

套一句我常常对members说的话，

我们都在学习啊！

对，我真的是彻彻底底地重新学习一向以来我引以为傲的时间管理！

还有人事……

站在这里看到的，

原来是充满缺点的自己

越做下去，我越没有自信

真的好惭愧

咳，真不知道该如何让自己重拾信心~

终于完成一半了！！

终于搞定最难搞的了！

现在就剩下一个,

还有thesis 的概念就完成了！！

明天，明天我一定会把所有东西一次搞定！！

放假回来的我一定是重生的我！

不会再有酱临时抱佛脚的事情发生的啦！！

张恩万加油！！↖(^ω^)↗

Decided to take a break!

I decided to give myself a break after Merdeka!
I clash all things together before Merdeka and promised all that I'll complete all those assignments, presentation preparation, thesis framework ideas, TM stuff and etc.
Here, am on my way of completing my 2nd assignment, two part more to go..
3rd assignment is awaiting me with the SPA and Job Malaysia stuff,
4th assignment is awaiting me with the SPSS analysis,
Abnormal psychology presentation slides,
Thesis framework to Dr. Rozainee..
and lastly, My TM LLDS preparations as well as the coaching syllabus for the newly entered TMers!


I wish I have a perfect time management!

奋斗中~

我一定可以完美地完成我的功课的！！！！

加油！！

不要浪费时间啦，

不要再不相信自己啦

不要再放弃自己啦！！

张恩万， 你可以的！